Just came back from Su Chang's house. The gathering there was pretty fun I guess.. played Wii and Taboo and ate pizza and snacks. Lol. I beat her at Mario Kart - AGAIN. xD
And omg lah Ros is pro. Beat me at Mario Kart somemore. *dies*
OK. Lets see how I fare tackling the next few essays.
Tomorrow's the final day... and after that, it's over. My school term in NUSHS ends officially. Oh well..
Sunday, November 30, 2008
Frustrations
My parents just left home for breakfast. I'm currently sitting here drafting pointers for the Harvard supplementary essay. Somehow why do I get this feeling that my essay is darn lame..
Sometimes my dad tries to start conversation with me, but I often find myself refusing to speak. I don't know why. Maybe it's in fear of an argument starting up again, or I am just pure lazy and can't be bothered with his occasionally probing antics. Regardless, it's kinda making me feel guilty.
But you see, every time either my sis or I open up to him, he'd sooner or later be able to piss us off, or somewhere along the negative. After being with him for a long while, one comes to realize that it is just not worth the effort to talk to my dad.
For instance, when I came back home yesterday and announced my change in plans, he showed no more interest than a simple "oh, how come?". I took pains to explain my thoughts and all, but all he does is stare at the TV, occasionally injecting an "mmm" or "I see". My mom.. I don't even want to think about it. It's almost as if she's totally ignoring me all the time unless I start a sentence with the word "MOM".
It's kind of frustrating. Maybe that's why I talk to them so little: I just cannot be bothered anymore. Whether I strike the lottery, or got into a fight outside school, so long as I don't tell my parents, they won't know - and will never know since they don't bother asking me about anything. Even if I did tell them something, they'd probably forget within the week. I don't know is it because work is always on their minds (rest their souls), or their memory is not as good as it used to be, but whatever the case...
OK stop. Enough ventilation.
God, forgive me...
Sometimes my dad tries to start conversation with me, but I often find myself refusing to speak. I don't know why. Maybe it's in fear of an argument starting up again, or I am just pure lazy and can't be bothered with his occasionally probing antics. Regardless, it's kinda making me feel guilty.
But you see, every time either my sis or I open up to him, he'd sooner or later be able to piss us off, or somewhere along the negative. After being with him for a long while, one comes to realize that it is just not worth the effort to talk to my dad.
For instance, when I came back home yesterday and announced my change in plans, he showed no more interest than a simple "oh, how come?". I took pains to explain my thoughts and all, but all he does is stare at the TV, occasionally injecting an "mmm" or "I see". My mom.. I don't even want to think about it. It's almost as if she's totally ignoring me all the time unless I start a sentence with the word "MOM".
It's kind of frustrating. Maybe that's why I talk to them so little: I just cannot be bothered anymore. Whether I strike the lottery, or got into a fight outside school, so long as I don't tell my parents, they won't know - and will never know since they don't bother asking me about anything. Even if I did tell them something, they'd probably forget within the week. I don't know is it because work is always on their minds (rest their souls), or their memory is not as good as it used to be, but whatever the case...
OK stop. Enough ventilation.
God, forgive me...
Saturday, November 29, 2008
A quick summary
OK feeling better now. Gaming kinda dulled my senses, but it's like mental anesthesia - it kills mental boredom, which is somewhat annoying and hard to shake off.
This morning was supposed to go run, but was lazy and overslept. Sigh. So went off to meet Mavis for pool at Parklane Mall. Hahaha the place was freaky; we're the only two people there lah.. Gosh. I need to find somewhere that has cheaper rates. T.T
After that, I traveled to Orchard Hotel for the PSC tea session. As expected, the talk didn't convince me to pursue their PSC scholarship (though I might just apply for it for the fun of things), but it did raise some important questions about what I want out of life and it challenged some of my previous assumptions I made about myself.
Sadly, I've even lost interest in the medicine scholarship offered by PSC.. is there really no scholarship that would fund a medical course, or better still, fund it without a bond? Sigh.
But that's not the most important. I was really bugged by this "revelation" that came to me as I stepped out of the hotel. I suddenly re-examined myself and my actions, only to discover that perhaps all this while, I've been living a dream, a delusion, purposely choosing to believe things other than the truth about who I am, and what I really want out of this life.
Learn. Teach. Research.
I know just what career offers this kind of opportunities. But guess what? No freaking scholarship is gonna fund me for this kind of aspiration.
And what about medicine? Am I to go back on my word now and give my friends and teachers the impression that I decided to be a real chicken-ass and go back on what I said about becoming a medical doctor, just because I don't feel patients are as important as students (well of course this is just an exaggeration. I definitely do not feel this way)?
This is kinda screwy. But hell, I'll figure something.
For now, I need to get admitted to one of the 7 US universities I am applying to... perhaps I should settle with an 8th school for safety sake? Then again, there's always UCL... -.-
I thank God that at the very least, I experienced this "enlightenment" today, and I would probably look forward to work more now... I hope. =\
This morning was supposed to go run, but was lazy and overslept. Sigh. So went off to meet Mavis for pool at Parklane Mall. Hahaha the place was freaky; we're the only two people there lah.. Gosh. I need to find somewhere that has cheaper rates. T.T
After that, I traveled to Orchard Hotel for the PSC tea session. As expected, the talk didn't convince me to pursue their PSC scholarship (though I might just apply for it for the fun of things), but it did raise some important questions about what I want out of life and it challenged some of my previous assumptions I made about myself.
Sadly, I've even lost interest in the medicine scholarship offered by PSC.. is there really no scholarship that would fund a medical course, or better still, fund it without a bond? Sigh.
But that's not the most important. I was really bugged by this "revelation" that came to me as I stepped out of the hotel. I suddenly re-examined myself and my actions, only to discover that perhaps all this while, I've been living a dream, a delusion, purposely choosing to believe things other than the truth about who I am, and what I really want out of this life.
Learn. Teach. Research.
I know just what career offers this kind of opportunities. But guess what? No freaking scholarship is gonna fund me for this kind of aspiration.
And what about medicine? Am I to go back on my word now and give my friends and teachers the impression that I decided to be a real chicken-ass and go back on what I said about becoming a medical doctor, just because I don't feel patients are as important as students (well of course this is just an exaggeration. I definitely do not feel this way)?
This is kinda screwy. But hell, I'll figure something.
For now, I need to get admitted to one of the 7 US universities I am applying to... perhaps I should settle with an 8th school for safety sake? Then again, there's always UCL... -.-
I thank God that at the very least, I experienced this "enlightenment" today, and I would probably look forward to work more now... I hope. =\
Someone seems to be gaining access to my accounts without my knowledge... my collegeboard account password got changed suddenly when I did nothing at all. Grr.
As if I do not have enough frustrations already.
...
I think I need to cool off... feeling uncomfortable at the moment.
Well, at least I think I know what keeps me coming back to work every day now...
As if I do not have enough frustrations already.
...
I think I need to cool off... feeling uncomfortable at the moment.
Well, at least I think I know what keeps me coming back to work every day now...
Friday, November 28, 2008
Just down on luck
My nose has been bleeding pretty badly over the past few days.. don't know if it's cos of the hot weather or not. This morning before I presented the IBN exit presentation, my nose suddenly had blood flowing from it, so I panicked and had to run all the way to the pantry (it was the closest place. Couldn't find toilet on 9th floor) and grabbed a handful of paper towels. The blood ended up soaking the entire towel and seeped through to my hands. Could smell the stink of blood on my palms even after my presentation was over. >.<
Rushed to school for full-dress rehearsal for convocation. Missed the first half, so could only walk up on stage for the awards section. Sian. Well at least I got used to wearing that gown.. gee. Feels weird.
I want to take photos, but I realize I'm in a terrible situation. 1. I'm sitting right at the corner, so there ain't much photos to take from there, and 2. none of my family members will be coming down for the ceremony. Oh well. I never expected any of them to attend to begin with, so I guess there's no need to be "sad" or anything.
Lent Eugene my laptop to burn DVDs after rehearsal, which was an epic failure. Burner was screwing with me today, and I wasted 2 blank DVDs in the process.
Returned to IBN after that. Felt so wasted during the afternoon. I started to get sick of the programme already... research is one thing, but the atmosphere there is so... different. There's no "research conducted for the sake of learning something new". Everything is about money, patents, publications, fame, glory, promotions, reputation, providing a selling point for the research institute, etc. Everything feels so damn commercial. It feels as if I am working in private R&D, except that the pay is probably worse and the hours are probably longer. Gah. The only plus side I can attribute to A*STAR is their research facilities, which are probably the best in Singapore, and the immense resource pool they have (look, they've funding from the government). Plus, not to mention the scholarship they provide...
Somehow, I am losing interest in everything - again.
Heck. Shall poke around with FIFA Online 2 for a bit then start on my essays. Shall attempt to finalize the MIT and Common App essays by today, and start drafting stuff for Harvard.
This is just like dance. One wrong step, and you're out of the game.
Rushed to school for full-dress rehearsal for convocation. Missed the first half, so could only walk up on stage for the awards section. Sian. Well at least I got used to wearing that gown.. gee. Feels weird.
I want to take photos, but I realize I'm in a terrible situation. 1. I'm sitting right at the corner, so there ain't much photos to take from there, and 2. none of my family members will be coming down for the ceremony. Oh well. I never expected any of them to attend to begin with, so I guess there's no need to be "sad" or anything.
Lent Eugene my laptop to burn DVDs after rehearsal, which was an epic failure. Burner was screwing with me today, and I wasted 2 blank DVDs in the process.
Returned to IBN after that. Felt so wasted during the afternoon. I started to get sick of the programme already... research is one thing, but the atmosphere there is so... different. There's no "research conducted for the sake of learning something new". Everything is about money, patents, publications, fame, glory, promotions, reputation, providing a selling point for the research institute, etc. Everything feels so damn commercial. It feels as if I am working in private R&D, except that the pay is probably worse and the hours are probably longer. Gah. The only plus side I can attribute to A*STAR is their research facilities, which are probably the best in Singapore, and the immense resource pool they have (look, they've funding from the government). Plus, not to mention the scholarship they provide...
Somehow, I am losing interest in everything - again.
Heck. Shall poke around with FIFA Online 2 for a bit then start on my essays. Shall attempt to finalize the MIT and Common App essays by today, and start drafting stuff for Harvard.
This is just like dance. One wrong step, and you're out of the game.
...
Ahh. Through the Arbor...
The school is quiet once again. Everyone is gone. I sit here, burning DVDs containing photos and videos of our memories, as well as well-wishes from those whom we hold dear to. Eugene is fumbling around with creating a new ISO containing the errata. Zhao Ye's burning DVDs as well, but she's more productive than I am - writing her application essays while waiting. Me? Well what can I say? I love... to blog.
I better get down to writing those damned essays too. I need to return to IBN in a while.. can't afford to keep Yifeng and Zijun waiting - well not that they need me that badly or what, but I've an obligation to return there for attachment.
But I don't want to go there. I feel like just sitting somewhere quiet to think, to reflect, to dream, to envision... how life's gonna be like for all of us when 2008 is over.
Sundial Dream... man Kevin Kern's works are beautiful.
Work work work.. we people are so busy working round the clock that we barely have enough time for ourselves, for friends, for family. Sad to say, I am not spared from this "tragedy", and I don't think I will be for the next decade or so.
Anyway. I shall just pick up the updated ISO before I leave. Can't afford to slack anymore.
The school is quiet once again. Everyone is gone. I sit here, burning DVDs containing photos and videos of our memories, as well as well-wishes from those whom we hold dear to. Eugene is fumbling around with creating a new ISO containing the errata. Zhao Ye's burning DVDs as well, but she's more productive than I am - writing her application essays while waiting. Me? Well what can I say? I love... to blog.
I better get down to writing those damned essays too. I need to return to IBN in a while.. can't afford to keep Yifeng and Zijun waiting - well not that they need me that badly or what, but I've an obligation to return there for attachment.
But I don't want to go there. I feel like just sitting somewhere quiet to think, to reflect, to dream, to envision... how life's gonna be like for all of us when 2008 is over.
Sundial Dream... man Kevin Kern's works are beautiful.
Work work work.. we people are so busy working round the clock that we barely have enough time for ourselves, for friends, for family. Sad to say, I am not spared from this "tragedy", and I don't think I will be for the next decade or so.
Anyway. I shall just pick up the updated ISO before I leave. Can't afford to slack anymore.
Thursday, November 27, 2008
Interview
So the interview went pretty fine. Didn't manage to meet JJ at DSO.. he said he left his phone at the counter. Oh well, there's tomorrow I suppose..
So little time left. I cannot believe it.
My interviewer is nice! He's quite a cool man in my opinion. But why do I get the feeling that he doesn't seem very keen of me applying to MIT? Hahahah.. well no surprises there. It's not as if I have the looks of an MIT student anyway.. -.-
Went to see Mr Allan after that and reviewed my MIT essay. Didn't get a chance to discuss the Common App essay with him.. and it seems I no longer have a chance to see him. What a shame.
Well, I guess I'm glad there's Mr Lim to read through my Common App. I suddenly find myself regretting not getting to know him better over the past few years. Sigh. Well I'm quite certain he will succeed in what he intends to do anyways.
Now, time to begin the Harvard supplement, or Cornell's, since I probably won't stand a chance at Harvard anyway. Applying there is equivalent to wasting my time and money. Same probably goes for most of the Ivies anyway. T.T
So little time left. I cannot believe it.
My interviewer is nice! He's quite a cool man in my opinion. But why do I get the feeling that he doesn't seem very keen of me applying to MIT? Hahahah.. well no surprises there. It's not as if I have the looks of an MIT student anyway.. -.-
Went to see Mr Allan after that and reviewed my MIT essay. Didn't get a chance to discuss the Common App essay with him.. and it seems I no longer have a chance to see him. What a shame.
Well, I guess I'm glad there's Mr Lim to read through my Common App. I suddenly find myself regretting not getting to know him better over the past few years. Sigh. Well I'm quite certain he will succeed in what he intends to do anyways.
Now, time to begin the Harvard supplement, or Cornell's, since I probably won't stand a chance at Harvard anyway. Applying there is equivalent to wasting my time and money. Same probably goes for most of the Ivies anyway. T.T
Doodeedoodoo...
Interview at DSO National Laboratories. No, I'm not applying to be attached there or whatever, just that my interviewer works there.
Hope things go well.
Hope things go well.
Wednesday, November 26, 2008
Convo rehearsal
As this chapter comes to a close and I get ready to flip the page, I can't help but wish that the chapter never ends, that the story continues on, that the words keep rolling on and on, that the sentences would not stop...
Perhaps this is one chapter which I would wish to keep open for the next few decades at the very least. I'll keep my fingers crossed that I will keep writing this page, and the next, and the one after that; that I will also play a part in writing the pages in my friends' books, just as they would in mine.
Ahhh. Just keep the water flowing, and one day after our long miles of travel, we will trek back and return to the source where we all came from. 饮水思源.
***
Went to school for convo rehearsal. Wasn't too eventful, apart from maybe the amusement of having received an award for outstanding contribution to the school and what not. I guess that more people certainly deserve this award than just the 5 of us receiving it, but oh well, it's the school's decision..
After that, went back to IBN for work. Pretty uneventful as well, apart from me completing the exit PPT, which I am to present to IBN staff before heading for convo full dress rehearsal on Friday morning. Was pretty lost when Zijun was doing lab work. Sigh.
I cannot imagine how out of sync I will be by next week. T.T
Nascans... haha pretty interesting developments there, I hear from Royston. Haha he's tempting me. =X
***
It's complicated. A part of me wishes I am right, yet the large part of me remains doubtful. Such things don't just fall out of the sky, you know.
I'm confused. Argh.
Perhaps this is one chapter which I would wish to keep open for the next few decades at the very least. I'll keep my fingers crossed that I will keep writing this page, and the next, and the one after that; that I will also play a part in writing the pages in my friends' books, just as they would in mine.
Ahhh. Just keep the water flowing, and one day after our long miles of travel, we will trek back and return to the source where we all came from. 饮水思源.
***
Went to school for convo rehearsal. Wasn't too eventful, apart from maybe the amusement of having received an award for outstanding contribution to the school and what not. I guess that more people certainly deserve this award than just the 5 of us receiving it, but oh well, it's the school's decision..
After that, went back to IBN for work. Pretty uneventful as well, apart from me completing the exit PPT, which I am to present to IBN staff before heading for convo full dress rehearsal on Friday morning. Was pretty lost when Zijun was doing lab work. Sigh.
I cannot imagine how out of sync I will be by next week. T.T
Nascans... haha pretty interesting developments there, I hear from Royston. Haha he's tempting me. =X
***
It's complicated. A part of me wishes I am right, yet the large part of me remains doubtful. Such things don't just fall out of the sky, you know.
I'm confused. Argh.
Tuesday, November 25, 2008
So this is how it feels
WAS SO SLEEPY DURING WORK TODAY.
Haha.
I enjoyed talking to my fellow lab mate Jocelyn during lunch hour today. Somehow, I felt as if I could trust her with things that I wouldn't even tell my closest of friends. Maybe it's because she's outside NUS High. Maybe it's because she's a J1. Maybe it's because I don't know her well. Oh well..
She made me realize some things about myself too. In the process of sharing my thoughts, I understood some things which I've never thought properly about before, and it was a nice feeling being able to know oneself better through talking to somebody else.
... I feel old. Damn old.
Was listening to Graduation by Vitamin C on the way back home today on the bus. For a moment, I just sat back and let images of life in NUSHS playback in my head as the chorus rolled on. Council, Fleming cheer, house events, Gavel, the juniors, all those overseas trips, competitions, chem O, hostel, orientation, everyday school life... it made me discover how many memories I will have of this place as I move on to NS, and subsequently for undergraduate studies. With much luck, I may find myself studying either in Cambridge or US in future, a long way away from home. Will certainly miss these days, cos I know once they are gone, they will never come back.
But I'll remember, that as our lives change, come whatever. We will still be friends forever. =)
Haha.
I enjoyed talking to my fellow lab mate Jocelyn during lunch hour today. Somehow, I felt as if I could trust her with things that I wouldn't even tell my closest of friends. Maybe it's because she's outside NUS High. Maybe it's because she's a J1. Maybe it's because I don't know her well. Oh well..
She made me realize some things about myself too. In the process of sharing my thoughts, I understood some things which I've never thought properly about before, and it was a nice feeling being able to know oneself better through talking to somebody else.
... I feel old. Damn old.
Was listening to Graduation by Vitamin C on the way back home today on the bus. For a moment, I just sat back and let images of life in NUSHS playback in my head as the chorus rolled on. Council, Fleming cheer, house events, Gavel, the juniors, all those overseas trips, competitions, chem O, hostel, orientation, everyday school life... it made me discover how many memories I will have of this place as I move on to NS, and subsequently for undergraduate studies. With much luck, I may find myself studying either in Cambridge or US in future, a long way away from home. Will certainly miss these days, cos I know once they are gone, they will never come back.
But I'll remember, that as our lives change, come whatever. We will still be friends forever. =)
Work starting soon
I hope I don't have to stare at freaking frustrating chromatography columns for the entire day today again. >.<
*fingers crossed*
*fingers crossed*
A quick post..
Gah. Nose started bleeding when I was showering. The taste of blood... Ergh. To be accurate, we can call it the taste of iron. =\
Must be dehydration. Need to drink more water.
Looking back more than half a year ago, I realize that my earlier predictions were wrong. There was no ballroom. There was no dance. There was no ultra-glam setting. There was no booze. There was no crazy post-prom party.
But I did not realize just how much more there was that night. There were friends. There were teachers. There were cheers and shouts. There were splendid suits and dresses. There were many photos taken. There was fun, laughter, peace and joy.
But most importantly, there was... *trails off*
Everything just felt right. Even if it didn't turn out the way I initially dreamed (fantasized) of it, it felt good. And that's all that really matters. =)
Must be dehydration. Need to drink more water.
Looking back more than half a year ago, I realize that my earlier predictions were wrong. There was no ballroom. There was no dance. There was no ultra-glam setting. There was no booze. There was no crazy post-prom party.
But I did not realize just how much more there was that night. There were friends. There were teachers. There were cheers and shouts. There were splendid suits and dresses. There were many photos taken. There was fun, laughter, peace and joy.
But most importantly, there was... *trails off*
Everything just felt right. Even if it didn't turn out the way I initially dreamed (fantasized) of it, it felt good. And that's all that really matters. =)
Monday, November 24, 2008
IBN today..
Size Exclusion Chromatography... I can't believe what I learnt of the theory during class time is coming to real-life use in the labs of IBN. All that stuff about eddy diffusion, largest eluted first, hydrophilic/hydrophobic properties... all coming to life.
Research really integrates and applies all that existing knowledge. I'm sort of grateful that we learnt all that stuff in chemistry major with honours.
Ergh. So late already. Haven't write MIT essay yet. I'm doomed. -.-
At least I'm done tagging all the facebook photos. =)
Research really integrates and applies all that existing knowledge. I'm sort of grateful that we learnt all that stuff in chemistry major with honours.
Ergh. So late already. Haven't write MIT essay yet. I'm doomed. -.-
At least I'm done tagging all the facebook photos. =)
Prom
So I guess this is how it feels like to live one's fantasy...
Prom's over! Utterly enjoyed it (with many thanks to the prom comm). Shall not delve into the details here due to shortage of time. A summary of the prom would be something like: Meet. Register. Eat. Game. Eat. Photo-taking. Prom King/Queen selection. Eat. More Games. Awards for Best Dressed. More photo-taking. End. Lol...
The post-prom KTV session was darn fun too. Sang from 12 midnight till 5.30am in the morning with a group of friends... my first time doing this kind of overnight "stint". Haha. I'm surprised I actually managed to keep awake.
After the thing, we went down to Macs for breakfast and parted ways. I sent my prom partner home, before resuming the journey back to Bishan. By the time I got back, it was 8am in the morning..
Slept peacefully for a good 4 hours, before waking up to a bad cram in my left calf - the usual. Spent the rest of the time on facebook looking through all those wonderful prom photos before changing and heading down to Normanton Park for BBQ with the councillors. Didn't really eat or do much there.. just sat down and talked to Mikel for quite a bit. Yeah.
At 9pm, Ros and I left and took bus service 166 all the way home. An hour's journey... she talked to me about her upcoming OBS trip and I told her about the funnier bits about prom: Like the game where we sent representatives from each table up on stage to contest over certain characteristics, the prom king/queen selection, the crazy photo-takings, etc.
Ahhhh... Prom just came and left so fast. Hope the memories stay forever... =)
Prom's over! Utterly enjoyed it (with many thanks to the prom comm). Shall not delve into the details here due to shortage of time. A summary of the prom would be something like: Meet. Register. Eat. Game. Eat. Photo-taking. Prom King/Queen selection. Eat. More Games. Awards for Best Dressed. More photo-taking. End. Lol...
The post-prom KTV session was darn fun too. Sang from 12 midnight till 5.30am in the morning with a group of friends... my first time doing this kind of overnight "stint". Haha. I'm surprised I actually managed to keep awake.
After the thing, we went down to Macs for breakfast and parted ways. I sent my prom partner home, before resuming the journey back to Bishan. By the time I got back, it was 8am in the morning..
Slept peacefully for a good 4 hours, before waking up to a bad cram in my left calf - the usual. Spent the rest of the time on facebook looking through all those wonderful prom photos before changing and heading down to Normanton Park for BBQ with the councillors. Didn't really eat or do much there.. just sat down and talked to Mikel for quite a bit. Yeah.
At 9pm, Ros and I left and took bus service 166 all the way home. An hour's journey... she talked to me about her upcoming OBS trip and I told her about the funnier bits about prom: Like the game where we sent representatives from each table up on stage to contest over certain characteristics, the prom king/queen selection, the crazy photo-takings, etc.
Ahhhh... Prom just came and left so fast. Hope the memories stay forever... =)
Saturday, November 22, 2008
Friday, November 21, 2008
IBN Open House
Work at IBN today was... OK. Did some graphs for my mentor in the morning together with Zijun, before heading off after lunch to help out at the IBN Open House. Saw Cleo and Yanling from NUSHS. Hahaha. So for the afternoon I brought a group of students from Singapore Poly around the IBN labs to look at the projects and such.
As I was looking at the work presented by the researchers, I was thinking, just thinking: Do I want myself to turn out like most of them when I work with A*STAR in future?
I don't know. *shudders*
Well it's not as if they are bad at research or what (in fact, their achievements are quite spectacular). I... just don't feel I want to be the kind of scientists they are. OK simply put, if you put an MIT prof and a prof working at A*STAR side by side... you'll get what I mean.
Suddenly, being an academic at a US university sounds so much more lucrative. -.-
Maybe I just can't get used to the fact that by working at A*STAR, I submit myself as a full-time employee to the research institutes. It just doesn't feel right for me. Somehow. I can't explain it.
OK. Perhaps it's just the 8.30am to 6pm work hours that is irritating me. Lecturers and profs at NUS or NTU don't get such strict work hours I bet. Grr.
Oh well, for the "Greater Good"...
Its gonna be a night
To remember
Come on now, big fun
Its gonna be the night
To last forever
We'll never ever ever forget
As I was looking at the work presented by the researchers, I was thinking, just thinking: Do I want myself to turn out like most of them when I work with A*STAR in future?
I don't know. *shudders*
Well it's not as if they are bad at research or what (in fact, their achievements are quite spectacular). I... just don't feel I want to be the kind of scientists they are. OK simply put, if you put an MIT prof and a prof working at A*STAR side by side... you'll get what I mean.
Suddenly, being an academic at a US university sounds so much more lucrative. -.-
Maybe I just can't get used to the fact that by working at A*STAR, I submit myself as a full-time employee to the research institutes. It just doesn't feel right for me. Somehow. I can't explain it.
OK. Perhaps it's just the 8.30am to 6pm work hours that is irritating me. Lecturers and profs at NUS or NTU don't get such strict work hours I bet. Grr.
Oh well, for the "Greater Good"...
Its gonna be a night
To remember
Come on now, big fun
Its gonna be the night
To last forever
We'll never ever ever forget
I should sleep the moment I get back home, and wake up early in the morning (like around 4am) to do work. I'm re-energized, refreshed, and get minimal disturbance. And the best part, is that I won't oversleep and become late for work.
Gah.
I enjoy the morning air. Lots... if not for the fact that I have to work every weekday. >.<
Gah.
I enjoy the morning air. Lots... if not for the fact that I have to work every weekday. >.<
Thursday, November 20, 2008
Prom is coming!
OK clarification to previous post. The offer was for biology course, not medicine.
One word I find very apt to this situation: "Meh".
SAT results are out. Didn't do too well. I guess I'm just thankful it didn't sink below 2K like I thought it would have.
Meh.
Research attachment is kinda sapping my energies to hell. Tomorrow doing research in lab for half a day, then heading off to bring students around IBN for Open House.
Meh.
I'm tired. Soulstorm is draggy.
Meh.
Still got so many freaking essays to write. Have yet to see Mr Allan. Deadline's coming soon.
Meh.
I hate Common App.
Meh.
NS is coming and I've not done any physical training to prepare for it.
Meh. Screw every damn thing lah.
BUT. I'm thankful there's one thing which I'm still looking forward to. Saturday...
Live your Fantasy...
One word I find very apt to this situation: "Meh".
SAT results are out. Didn't do too well. I guess I'm just thankful it didn't sink below 2K like I thought it would have.
Meh.
Research attachment is kinda sapping my energies to hell. Tomorrow doing research in lab for half a day, then heading off to bring students around IBN for Open House.
Meh.
I'm tired. Soulstorm is draggy.
Meh.
Still got so many freaking essays to write. Have yet to see Mr Allan. Deadline's coming soon.
Meh.
I hate Common App.
Meh.
NS is coming and I've not done any physical training to prepare for it.
Meh. Screw every damn thing lah.
BUT. I'm thankful there's one thing which I'm still looking forward to. Saturday...
Live your Fantasy...
Wednesday, November 19, 2008
Exhausted!
Gosh it's so freaking exhausting, working at a research lab. Maybe it's cos I'm doing experiment whole day, unlike people like Gary who can just culture his E. coli and sit there for the next three hours staring at his com. o.O
I still can't figure out how I feel towards the research culture at A*STAR. Will need more time to decide I guess.
Random phrase: If only my love could flow like chloroform out of a squirt bottle: It just takes a small push to get everything going.
-.-
I still can't figure out how I feel towards the research culture at A*STAR. Will need more time to decide I guess.
Random phrase: If only my love could flow like chloroform out of a squirt bottle: It just takes a small push to get everything going.
-.-
Tuesday, November 18, 2008
Work work work
Synthesis work... hmm. I suddenly don't feel like studying bio for undergrad. HAHA. xD
Things went much better today. Felt so much more productive working at the lab - even though it wasn't exactly supposed to be "doing my research", but hey, the feeling of getting my hands into science again is nice - especially when we're talking about synthesis and getting to handle spectroscopy too. Haha. xD
Essay writing is zzz.
I enjoy the lunch times spent with Royston and Gary. It really makes me look forward to going Biopolis every day. Otherwise I'd probably just rot and die there.
Lesson learnt: Never eat too full a meal for lunch.
Anyway, more talk next time. Haha.
Things went much better today. Felt so much more productive working at the lab - even though it wasn't exactly supposed to be "doing my research", but hey, the feeling of getting my hands into science again is nice - especially when we're talking about synthesis and getting to handle spectroscopy too. Haha. xD
Essay writing is zzz.
I enjoy the lunch times spent with Royston and Gary. It really makes me look forward to going Biopolis every day. Otherwise I'd probably just rot and die there.
Lesson learnt: Never eat too full a meal for lunch.
Anyway, more talk next time. Haha.
Monday, November 17, 2008
A*STAR attachment starts
Quantum Dots. Quantum Dots. Quantum Dots.
Die lah. So screwed. So much physics, chemistry and biology all at once. OK maybe not so much bio, apart from the applications part. Understanding QD needs physics. Synthesizing QD needs chemistry. Applying QD needs biology.
Zzz.
Today had orientation for YRP attachment at IBN. Was pretty boring for most part of the day actually, aside from getting acquainted with the laboratory and being introduced to the field of work the researchers are working on. Quantum dots! Hahaha interesting stuff. Quite eager to learning what it's all about and getting started with the research bit. Means I've to do lots and lots of reading up along the way too.
And the topics... not easy, especially when we're talking about semiconductors and possibly some quantum mechanics too. Sigh.
But nevertheless, interesting.
Ran overtime today too - by one whole damn hour. Silly safety lecture and orientation. Sigh. Hopefully won't run OT tomorrow.
Can't wait till this Saturday! =D
Die lah. So screwed. So much physics, chemistry and biology all at once. OK maybe not so much bio, apart from the applications part. Understanding QD needs physics. Synthesizing QD needs chemistry. Applying QD needs biology.
Zzz.
Today had orientation for YRP attachment at IBN. Was pretty boring for most part of the day actually, aside from getting acquainted with the laboratory and being introduced to the field of work the researchers are working on. Quantum dots! Hahaha interesting stuff. Quite eager to learning what it's all about and getting started with the research bit. Means I've to do lots and lots of reading up along the way too.
And the topics... not easy, especially when we're talking about semiconductors and possibly some quantum mechanics too. Sigh.
But nevertheless, interesting.
Ran overtime today too - by one whole damn hour. Silly safety lecture and orientation. Sigh. Hopefully won't run OT tomorrow.
Can't wait till this Saturday! =D
Sunday, November 16, 2008
I need to make a mental note not to sound so depressed all the time when I talk to friends. Thinking back at the way I relate things to people, I sound as if I come from quite an under-privileged background and things are not at all very favourable in my shoes.
No. I cannot make myself sound so miserable (not when I am not miserable to begin with). I need to stand strong and confident. I don't need to resort to earning others sympathy to gain their attention. That's not what a real man should do. A real man should stand up for what he believes in. A real man is a fighter. A real man is a thinker and do-er.
I will bear that in mind more carefully as tomorrow comes...
IBN, here I come. >.<
No. I cannot make myself sound so miserable (not when I am not miserable to begin with). I need to stand strong and confident. I don't need to resort to earning others sympathy to gain their attention. That's not what a real man should do. A real man should stand up for what he believes in. A real man is a fighter. A real man is a thinker and do-er.
I will bear that in mind more carefully as tomorrow comes...
IBN, here I come. >.<
Attachment starts tomorrow
... I didn't know a female's corsage is more expensive than a male's boutonnière. Sheesh man.
I need to be careful where I put my money. Otherwise I'll find myself a man with burnt pockets by the end of the week. T.T
Went to see the dentist today. Gosh I really miss the kind of service I see every day at GPA Dental Services... My dentist took only 8 minutes to polish my teeth. 8 MINUTES! At GPA even the AIA patients get at least what, 10 to 15 minutes worth of polishing if the dentist is nice? What the hell man.
But I don't blame the dentist. When I left his room, I saw that there were 4 more patients waiting to be attended to by him. T.T
Poor guy. So busy.
Soulstorm! Sisters of Battle! Well not exactly my favourite team (space marines forever! xD), but they certainly are interesting to play... so much cleansing fire.
OK I better get along with my essays. Common app first draft almost done, need to start with the supplement essays... sighs.
1 day more till attachment starts, 1 week more till prom, 2 weeks more till convo, less than a month left till enlistment. Time is just too short, I swear.
I hope I get to see everyone on X'mas. I got this nagging feeling I'm missing friends already. >.<
I need to be careful where I put my money. Otherwise I'll find myself a man with burnt pockets by the end of the week. T.T
Went to see the dentist today. Gosh I really miss the kind of service I see every day at GPA Dental Services... My dentist took only 8 minutes to polish my teeth. 8 MINUTES! At GPA even the AIA patients get at least what, 10 to 15 minutes worth of polishing if the dentist is nice? What the hell man.
But I don't blame the dentist. When I left his room, I saw that there were 4 more patients waiting to be attended to by him. T.T
Poor guy. So busy.
Soulstorm! Sisters of Battle! Well not exactly my favourite team (space marines forever! xD), but they certainly are interesting to play... so much cleansing fire.
OK I better get along with my essays. Common app first draft almost done, need to start with the supplement essays... sighs.
1 day more till attachment starts, 1 week more till prom, 2 weeks more till convo, less than a month left till enlistment. Time is just too short, I swear.
I hope I get to see everyone on X'mas. I got this nagging feeling I'm missing friends already. >.<
Saturday, November 15, 2008
Essay writing. Sigh.
Just had my hair cut. Gonna go see the dentist tomorrow for check up. I think my teeth are a nightmare to dentists... never take care of my teeth properly. Hahas.
Wah I swear my legs are damn bloody aching and painful. It was so annoying walking from the bus stop to home. And how am I supposed to go for evening runs like that? Sheesh.
1 week to prom. Slight more than 2 weeks to convocation. 1 month to end of attachment and enlistment... Sigh. Time passes so fast. I just wished I had spent more time with the people I am/want to be close to. The attachment at IBN will most certainly drain of any remaining time (and hope) of me going out with friends, but I am not gonna give up. Not when I'm stupid enough to fail NAPFA and enter NS early.
I don't know what I did, or why she is like that, but I guess if she chooses to, then I won't stop her. Besides, I don't see the point in wasting any extra effort - when I think I did nothing to begin with.
I think it's important for me to separate work and otherwise. I cannot afford to compromise my ability to keep the team together.
Wah I swear my legs are damn bloody aching and painful. It was so annoying walking from the bus stop to home. And how am I supposed to go for evening runs like that? Sheesh.
1 week to prom. Slight more than 2 weeks to convocation. 1 month to end of attachment and enlistment... Sigh. Time passes so fast. I just wished I had spent more time with the people I am/want to be close to. The attachment at IBN will most certainly drain of any remaining time (and hope) of me going out with friends, but I am not gonna give up. Not when I'm stupid enough to fail NAPFA and enter NS early.
I don't know what I did, or why she is like that, but I guess if she chooses to, then I won't stop her. Besides, I don't see the point in wasting any extra effort - when I think I did nothing to begin with.
I think it's important for me to separate work and otherwise. I cannot afford to compromise my ability to keep the team together.
Friday, November 14, 2008
Mixed emotions
Sports Day 2 is over.
This means the school year officially ends.
Ran 4x100m today. I swear that after all the long distance training, I suddenly forgot how to sprint. Felt bad cos it seems as if I lost the chance of pushing my team to 5th or 6th place. Oh well.
Fleming got 4th - again. Oh well, guess I don't have the privilege of seeing Fleming rise to anything above 4th place in my school term.
Yun Hui got a set of nice printed shirts with the words "We Founded Fleming" on them, and gave them out to the Year 6 Fleming seniors. How sweet! Thanks Yun Hui!
Faraday got first - AGAIN. Congrats Faraday. =)
Had a short "interview" - or Q&A session rather - with Dr Hang in the afternoon. It felt so good being able to share my aspirations with someone in the school. Hmm... how long will I be denied the opportunity to come back and teach at NUSHS? I wonder.
Went out to watch Quantum of Solace at the Cathay after that. Wanted to watch Madagascar 2 actually (although I did not watch the prequel), but the thing was bloody scheduled at 6.05pm, and the student offer was not valid then. SIGH. Well, QoS wasn't as good as it was publicized, I guess. All the action and shooting really took the attention away from the plot, which I felt could have been delved into more.
I hope things today went OK...
These emotions I cannot describe. I cannot explain. I don't know why. And you know what? I hate this feeling. I hate living with the knowledge that I don't understand what I am doing sometimes. I must get to the bottom of it.
This means the school year officially ends.
Ran 4x100m today. I swear that after all the long distance training, I suddenly forgot how to sprint. Felt bad cos it seems as if I lost the chance of pushing my team to 5th or 6th place. Oh well.
Fleming got 4th - again. Oh well, guess I don't have the privilege of seeing Fleming rise to anything above 4th place in my school term.
Yun Hui got a set of nice printed shirts with the words "We Founded Fleming" on them, and gave them out to the Year 6 Fleming seniors. How sweet! Thanks Yun Hui!
Faraday got first - AGAIN. Congrats Faraday. =)
Had a short "interview" - or Q&A session rather - with Dr Hang in the afternoon. It felt so good being able to share my aspirations with someone in the school. Hmm... how long will I be denied the opportunity to come back and teach at NUSHS? I wonder.
Went out to watch Quantum of Solace at the Cathay after that. Wanted to watch Madagascar 2 actually (although I did not watch the prequel), but the thing was bloody scheduled at 6.05pm, and the student offer was not valid then. SIGH. Well, QoS wasn't as good as it was publicized, I guess. All the action and shooting really took the attention away from the plot, which I felt could have been delved into more.
I hope things today went OK...
These emotions I cannot describe. I cannot explain. I don't know why. And you know what? I hate this feeling. I hate living with the knowledge that I don't understand what I am doing sometimes. I must get to the bottom of it.
Thursday, November 13, 2008
Sports Day 1
First off, before I begin posting about today's sports day, here's a link that goes out to all who is interested in a future career in medicine or biochemistry research:
http://scholarsvillage.com/index.php/internship-in-medicine--bio-research
Yes. Internships in medicine/bio research. If you wish to obtain the direct contact with the founder of the organization that is coordinating this, please IM me for his MSN address.
OK with that said, here's a summary of today:
Sports Day 1! I came in slightly late, cos I sort of left the house late I guess. Haiz. Then in the end didn't go up on stage to do oath taking. Oops? Haha. Then we waited in the hall a bit for the weather to clear up slightly before going out to run. Most of the long-distance events (800m, 1500m, 4x400m) were ran today, with the exception of 4x400m A division boys, because the rain grew heavier towards noon. I wasn't supposed to run today, but had to replace Shi Yi for 800m! Argh so shitty... shorts kept threatening to fall off while running too. Sian.
If Shi Yi were there, he could have claimed 3rd or 4th place I bet. Oh well. =(
After the prize giving (of which I no longer felt sore that Fleming's still trailing in points - OK fine maybe a little), Mr Ang was like, scolding the whole school for what they did with the silver spheres thing. Then he mentioned about the Year 6s and how we "have far exceeded expectations" and have even "caused tremors within our top rivals". Hahahaha... felt so proud. OK fine maybe it wasn't me specifically exceeding expectations and causing tremors, but still, it felt good to be part of the winning team. Heh.
The juniors have a big bloody pair of shoes to fill in after our batch graduates. Heh. I wonder what will the school even be like 2 years later when I leave NS. Maybe I can consider teaching part time then before I head off for uni education or something. Hmmm.
Anyway, after sports day I had lunch in school before heading down to Biopolis to pass the (rather crumpled) supporting documents to A*GA. Then headed home after that. Overslept and missed the bus stop I was supposed to alight at, but I took a nice walk after that. Sort of feels nice taking a walk all by yourself in the district you've grown up in for the past 18 years, and relish the feeling of seeing what has changed, what has remained the same, etc.
Or perhaps, I just needed some time alone.
A*STAR ESSAY. ARGH. Will just spam as much as I can to fill up the word limit before submitting it I guess. >.<
1 day more.. I'm looking forward to tomorrow. Haha. =)
******
Just some food for thought:
Valedictorian
Excerpt from Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia
Valedictorian is an academic title typically conferred upon the highest ranked student among those being graduated from an educational institution. The term is an anglicized derivation of the Latin vale dicere ("to say farewell"), historically rooted in the valedictorian's traditional role as the final speaker at the graduation ceremony. The valedictory address generally is considered a final farewell to classmates, before they disperse as a collective group in order to pursue their individual paths after being graduated. The title of class valedictorian is common in educational institutions in Canada and the United States, while its equivalent in Australia, New Zealand, South Africa and Scotland is dux.
How an individual school confers the title and determines its criteria varies from institution to institution. Generally, the graduate deemed to be the highest academically ranked student in the class, as determined by the academic criteria of the school, is conferred the title of class valedictorian. Some institutions confer the title to the class member chosen to deliver the final graduation address, regardless of the speaker's academic credentials. Historically and traditionally, however, schools confer the title upon the top ranking graduate of the class, who thereby earns the honor of delivering the valedictory address.
http://scholarsvillage.com/index.php/internship-in-medicine--bio-research
Yes. Internships in medicine/bio research. If you wish to obtain the direct contact with the founder of the organization that is coordinating this, please IM me for his MSN address.
OK with that said, here's a summary of today:
Sports Day 1! I came in slightly late, cos I sort of left the house late I guess. Haiz. Then in the end didn't go up on stage to do oath taking. Oops? Haha. Then we waited in the hall a bit for the weather to clear up slightly before going out to run. Most of the long-distance events (800m, 1500m, 4x400m) were ran today, with the exception of 4x400m A division boys, because the rain grew heavier towards noon. I wasn't supposed to run today, but had to replace Shi Yi for 800m! Argh so shitty... shorts kept threatening to fall off while running too. Sian.
If Shi Yi were there, he could have claimed 3rd or 4th place I bet. Oh well. =(
After the prize giving (of which I no longer felt sore that Fleming's still trailing in points - OK fine maybe a little), Mr Ang was like, scolding the whole school for what they did with the silver spheres thing. Then he mentioned about the Year 6s and how we "have far exceeded expectations" and have even "caused tremors within our top rivals". Hahahaha... felt so proud. OK fine maybe it wasn't me specifically exceeding expectations and causing tremors, but still, it felt good to be part of the winning team. Heh.
The juniors have a big bloody pair of shoes to fill in after our batch graduates. Heh. I wonder what will the school even be like 2 years later when I leave NS. Maybe I can consider teaching part time then before I head off for uni education or something. Hmmm.
Anyway, after sports day I had lunch in school before heading down to Biopolis to pass the (rather crumpled) supporting documents to A*GA. Then headed home after that. Overslept and missed the bus stop I was supposed to alight at, but I took a nice walk after that. Sort of feels nice taking a walk all by yourself in the district you've grown up in for the past 18 years, and relish the feeling of seeing what has changed, what has remained the same, etc.
Or perhaps, I just needed some time alone.
A*STAR ESSAY. ARGH. Will just spam as much as I can to fill up the word limit before submitting it I guess. >.<
1 day more.. I'm looking forward to tomorrow. Haha. =)
******
Just some food for thought:
Valedictorian
Excerpt from Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia
Valedictorian is an academic title typically conferred upon the highest ranked student among those being graduated from an educational institution. The term is an anglicized derivation of the Latin vale dicere ("to say farewell"), historically rooted in the valedictorian's traditional role as the final speaker at the graduation ceremony. The valedictory address generally is considered a final farewell to classmates, before they disperse as a collective group in order to pursue their individual paths after being graduated. The title of class valedictorian is common in educational institutions in Canada and the United States, while its equivalent in Australia, New Zealand, South Africa and Scotland is dux.
How an individual school confers the title and determines its criteria varies from institution to institution. Generally, the graduate deemed to be the highest academically ranked student in the class, as determined by the academic criteria of the school, is conferred the title of class valedictorian. Some institutions confer the title to the class member chosen to deliver the final graduation address, regardless of the speaker's academic credentials. Historically and traditionally, however, schools confer the title upon the top ranking graduate of the class, who thereby earns the honor of delivering the valedictory address.
Wednesday, November 12, 2008
This feels weird
The feeling is strange. It's almost as if we are strangers: I don't know you, you don't know me. Even if we did know each other, it somehow seems as if both parties are refusing to acknowledge that. It feels so weird to know that you know someone yet both sides are refusing to meet eye-to-eye (literally and figuratively). Well, not that I really need this to ascertain the "status" of the relationship, but nevertheless, it's disturbing.
I don't know. I'm not too particular about this sorta thing anymore. Besides, trust is 1. mutual, 2. flows like running water, and 3. freely given and taken away.
Anyway, I shall not think about it. Don't think I'll bother blogging much about today, except for the fact that I went back to school to see Mr Allan regarding my common app essay, which didn't turn out as bad as I thought (probably cos I've not even finished draft 1).
Sports day tomorrow. Two more days of the 2008 school year...
I don't know. I'm not too particular about this sorta thing anymore. Besides, trust is 1. mutual, 2. flows like running water, and 3. freely given and taken away.
Anyway, I shall not think about it. Don't think I'll bother blogging much about today, except for the fact that I went back to school to see Mr Allan regarding my common app essay, which didn't turn out as bad as I thought (probably cos I've not even finished draft 1).
Sports day tomorrow. Two more days of the 2008 school year...
Rollback
OK in view of overwhelming response, I shall revert back to this skin for now.
I am still looking for a new skin though. Haha. Damn maybe I should ask Eugene to just pass me a template that I can whack around with or something.
Haha. Hopefully it'll go easier on the eyes this time. o.O
I am still looking for a new skin though. Haha. Damn maybe I should ask Eugene to just pass me a template that I can whack around with or something.
Haha. Hopefully it'll go easier on the eyes this time. o.O
Blog Skin
New skin! Haha. Received some feedback that my previous blog skin was, err, not conducive for reading. So I switched it and hopefully it's slightly better this time.
Please read my foreword before commenting on the new skin.
And to be honest, I was looking for a skin with a "cruciform" on it, or a more Christian-based skin. But hmm this will do for now.
Too bad I don't know how to design blog skins. Even if I did, I wouldn't have the time to design it I'd imagine. o.O
Please read my foreword before commenting on the new skin.
And to be honest, I was looking for a skin with a "cruciform" on it, or a more Christian-based skin. But hmm this will do for now.
Too bad I don't know how to design blog skins. Even if I did, I wouldn't have the time to design it I'd imagine. o.O
Tuesday, November 11, 2008
Politician = OK
Devout Christian = OK
Politician + Devout Christian + Mixing them together = TOTALLY NOT OK.
Haha. Yes God bless you, Sarah Palin. Glad to see you are not giving up the possibility of running for President of United States of America. God Bless Uncle Sam too.
Today was gown collection day! Wemt to school at 8am in the morning to pass Royston the DoW series of games - looking forward to playing with him, Kenneth and Nic on hamachi! Haha then went to find Dr Seah to pick up letter and thereafter spent my time editing my common app and A*STAR essay. Sian. Then went down to library to stone. Read Richard Feynman's "QED". Haha interesting little book, supposed to be able to explain quantum electrodynamics to even "non-physics" students. xD
At 11am, we headed to theaterette to pick up the grad gown. Well, the colour isn't anything wow-ish, but I guess black and gold is a pretty decent combination of colours. Eugene was the first one to try on his gown, then cameras started flashing and everyone started taking their gowns out to try. Feels weird to be in it..
Graduation. Convocation. Haiz.
Next, after collecting gown I went to see Mr Lim to pick up his letter. We had quite a chat about my aspirations and what I wanted to achieve out of working at A*STAR (he was nice and spot-on with most of my current observations of my situation. He even highlighted some concerns I never thought of before, like NUS medical school's possible reaction to my interest in research above practice). After that I popped by Mr Allan's office for a bit before joining the guys in the canteen to go Dhoby Ghaut for LAN.
LAN! OMG so deprived already. 4 hours of non-stop Call of Duty 4, and ending with a knife-match! HAHA omg great stuff. Love that game to hell man. But on hindsight, it got kinda sian after a while, because I started to lose my (beginner's) luck in later matches and could not get top scorer for the round. Zzz. Could be because Nat started playing subsequently and made my life slightly more difficult to manage..
On a sidenote though, I realized my style of play is quite different from most of the guys. While most of them are quite liberal with the number of deaths they take, I always maintain as low a death rate I can for every round. That could also explain my similarly low kill rates. =\
Anyway, after LAN, we ate dinner at Macs (mmm Mega Mac is good), and then headed home after that. Feeling drained.
Another day tomorrow. Another day gone from today. 3 days left to the school year...
Devout Christian = OK
Politician + Devout Christian + Mixing them together = TOTALLY NOT OK.
Haha. Yes God bless you, Sarah Palin. Glad to see you are not giving up the possibility of running for President of United States of America. God Bless Uncle Sam too.
Today was gown collection day! Wemt to school at 8am in the morning to pass Royston the DoW series of games - looking forward to playing with him, Kenneth and Nic on hamachi! Haha then went to find Dr Seah to pick up letter and thereafter spent my time editing my common app and A*STAR essay. Sian. Then went down to library to stone. Read Richard Feynman's "QED". Haha interesting little book, supposed to be able to explain quantum electrodynamics to even "non-physics" students. xD
At 11am, we headed to theaterette to pick up the grad gown. Well, the colour isn't anything wow-ish, but I guess black and gold is a pretty decent combination of colours. Eugene was the first one to try on his gown, then cameras started flashing and everyone started taking their gowns out to try. Feels weird to be in it..
Graduation. Convocation. Haiz.
Next, after collecting gown I went to see Mr Lim to pick up his letter. We had quite a chat about my aspirations and what I wanted to achieve out of working at A*STAR (he was nice and spot-on with most of my current observations of my situation. He even highlighted some concerns I never thought of before, like NUS medical school's possible reaction to my interest in research above practice). After that I popped by Mr Allan's office for a bit before joining the guys in the canteen to go Dhoby Ghaut for LAN.
LAN! OMG so deprived already. 4 hours of non-stop Call of Duty 4, and ending with a knife-match! HAHA omg great stuff. Love that game to hell man. But on hindsight, it got kinda sian after a while, because I started to lose my (beginner's) luck in later matches and could not get top scorer for the round. Zzz. Could be because Nat started playing subsequently and made my life slightly more difficult to manage..
On a sidenote though, I realized my style of play is quite different from most of the guys. While most of them are quite liberal with the number of deaths they take, I always maintain as low a death rate I can for every round. That could also explain my similarly low kill rates. =\
Anyway, after LAN, we ate dinner at Macs (mmm Mega Mac is good), and then headed home after that. Feeling drained.
Another day tomorrow. Another day gone from today. 3 days left to the school year...
Monday, November 10, 2008
I suddenly thought about school and how I always tell people that it's OK, we're going to leave and it's part and parcel of growing up and stuff... yeah. It sounds so easy to say - until I thought of the people I am going to leave behind in the school.
Juniors... like Kenneth, Royston, Andy, Su Chang, Zhong Ming.
Teachers... like Dr Seah, Mr Lim, Mr Murali.
Admin staff... like Ms Mazni.
All these familiar faces... I might not be able to see them as often as I can now. Thinking about it makes me... sad.
I know not of how much I have made changes to the lives of people I met in this school, and I can't imagine what kind of reprecussions there will be long after I am gone from here. However, I hope, I just hope, that I will get to come back one day and witness the fruits of labour emerge.
No matter how far
I can go the distance.
But I want you to remember
That my heart will always belong to wherever I start.
Juniors... like Kenneth, Royston, Andy, Su Chang, Zhong Ming.
Teachers... like Dr Seah, Mr Lim, Mr Murali.
Admin staff... like Ms Mazni.
All these familiar faces... I might not be able to see them as often as I can now. Thinking about it makes me... sad.
I know not of how much I have made changes to the lives of people I met in this school, and I can't imagine what kind of reprecussions there will be long after I am gone from here. However, I hope, I just hope, that I will get to come back one day and witness the fruits of labour emerge.
No matter how far
I can go the distance.
But I want you to remember
That my heart will always belong to wherever I start.
Lead by Example
Didn't blog yesterday... was busy rushing out agenda last minute for today's alumni exco meeting. Haha. So I shall blog about what happened yesterday first.
Yesterday I went for Suchang's house warming in the afternoon! Played Mario Kart, Boxing, and Raving Rabbids on Nintendo Wii! Hahahaha... darn fun. Must play more Mario Kart with Suchang sometime. Heh heh. xD
Wah, but I swear travelling to Tampines is definitely quite out of my way. Takes more than an hour to get there from home man... sheesh.
But I am glad that I made the decision to go. Was tempted to say that I was busy writing my essays, but I knew better. Haha.
Thanks for the gifts, Suchang! The box of quotes on "success" are really meaningful. =)
Ahhh there was so much going on there, but I think Suchang probably put the full details on her blog. I'm lazy to write out what happened...
Today! Went to school at 8.15am to run with Eugene, but stopped short at 6 rounds because of bad weather (and thankfully too. Was feeling damn out of breath somewhat. Must have been my cold). Went to wash up and proceeded for alumni exco meeting at 10am. Was great. Meeting went pretty constructively, and I see some potential in some of us collaborating to get big things done next year. Haha... hopefully we can keep up the momentum even after the guys leave for NS and subsequently the girls move overseas for undergrad studies. Might have to expand the exco further with more Year 6s if that happens. T.T
Meeting took 1.5 hours. Hmm, overshot my initial expectations of 1 hour, but I guess 1.5 hours is a pretty decent period of time. I don't think our efficiency would be any better beyond that period of time.
Went for lunch at KFC with Eugene after that and chatted with him on the bus all the way home. Eugene's a great guy to talk to sometimes I guess - even for serious stuff - so long as he's not bragging or being irritating. xD
******
I feel a great sense of uplifting, and at the same time, worry. Uplift, because I see great potential in collaboration within the group. Worry, because I forsee certain members (myself included) being not able to commit themselves to contributing to the cause. Even if people cannot commit in terms of actual work, I still have doubts of whether people are willing to put their heart and soul into this venture...
But who am I to judge?
I will do what I can do as a leader, however, and that is to Lead by Example. I may not have expertise in working with organizations like Ying Zhen does, nor IT expertise like Eugene does, or art and design experience like Theo and Nic do, but I will make sure I play my part and contribute my spirit and enthusiasm towards making this a success. I hope that my actions and positive outlook would encourage my team mates to share the same vision I do and work together with a stronger, more united sense of cause, and achieve great things together. After all, if I, as a leader of a committee, do not take the first step forward, then who would?
I hope... I just hope... that things will be alright.
Dear God, give me the strength to lead.
Yesterday I went for Suchang's house warming in the afternoon! Played Mario Kart, Boxing, and Raving Rabbids on Nintendo Wii! Hahahaha... darn fun. Must play more Mario Kart with Suchang sometime. Heh heh. xD
Wah, but I swear travelling to Tampines is definitely quite out of my way. Takes more than an hour to get there from home man... sheesh.
But I am glad that I made the decision to go. Was tempted to say that I was busy writing my essays, but I knew better. Haha.
Thanks for the gifts, Suchang! The box of quotes on "success" are really meaningful. =)
Ahhh there was so much going on there, but I think Suchang probably put the full details on her blog. I'm lazy to write out what happened...
Today! Went to school at 8.15am to run with Eugene, but stopped short at 6 rounds because of bad weather (and thankfully too. Was feeling damn out of breath somewhat. Must have been my cold). Went to wash up and proceeded for alumni exco meeting at 10am. Was great. Meeting went pretty constructively, and I see some potential in some of us collaborating to get big things done next year. Haha... hopefully we can keep up the momentum even after the guys leave for NS and subsequently the girls move overseas for undergrad studies. Might have to expand the exco further with more Year 6s if that happens. T.T
Meeting took 1.5 hours. Hmm, overshot my initial expectations of 1 hour, but I guess 1.5 hours is a pretty decent period of time. I don't think our efficiency would be any better beyond that period of time.
Went for lunch at KFC with Eugene after that and chatted with him on the bus all the way home. Eugene's a great guy to talk to sometimes I guess - even for serious stuff - so long as he's not bragging or being irritating. xD
******
I feel a great sense of uplifting, and at the same time, worry. Uplift, because I see great potential in collaboration within the group. Worry, because I forsee certain members (myself included) being not able to commit themselves to contributing to the cause. Even if people cannot commit in terms of actual work, I still have doubts of whether people are willing to put their heart and soul into this venture...
But who am I to judge?
I will do what I can do as a leader, however, and that is to Lead by Example. I may not have expertise in working with organizations like Ying Zhen does, nor IT expertise like Eugene does, or art and design experience like Theo and Nic do, but I will make sure I play my part and contribute my spirit and enthusiasm towards making this a success. I hope that my actions and positive outlook would encourage my team mates to share the same vision I do and work together with a stronger, more united sense of cause, and achieve great things together. After all, if I, as a leader of a committee, do not take the first step forward, then who would?
I hope... I just hope... that things will be alright.
Dear God, give me the strength to lead.
Saturday, November 08, 2008
BMAT over!
Haha so BMAT is over. Screwed up section 1, but I guess I am glad that I didn't exactly disappoint myself for the essay. I wonder if the readers will be convinced with my proposed experiment. =\
Anyway, I'm glad it's over.
Now I've all those silly essays to contend with...
First off, A*STAR...
Anyway, I'm glad it's over.
Now I've all those silly essays to contend with...
First off, A*STAR...
BMAT...
BMAT in a couple of hours. Feeling somewhat nervous... sheesh.
I hope this will be the start of some good things to come.
I hope this will be the start of some good things to come.
Friday, November 07, 2008
BMAT tomorrow
Internship programme ends today! Haha feel kinda relieved and at the same time, sad. Won't be seeing people like Ben or Mike or Eva for a while now...
After internship, Ada, Eun and I met Nic Wong to go to his Aunt's restaurant to have dinner. Hmm nice place haha. Bryan joined us too! Then we sat there chilling out a bit till around 8+ before leaving.
Time sure flies. BMAT is tomorrow. And after that... no more tests/exams! For a while at least. Hopefully won't need to retake SAT.
After internship, Ada, Eun and I met Nic Wong to go to his Aunt's restaurant to have dinner. Hmm nice place haha. Bryan joined us too! Then we sat there chilling out a bit till around 8+ before leaving.
Time sure flies. BMAT is tomorrow. And after that... no more tests/exams! For a while at least. Hopefully won't need to retake SAT.
Internship Ends
3 more hours till internship ends!
AND I AM FEELING SLEEPY.
And there's BMAT tomorrow... man I just hope I don't run out of time for each section and can plan and write a decent essay for tomorrow. If the essay questions turn out like those in the sample questions online, I am so dead man... >.<
SLEEPY!
AND I AM FEELING SLEEPY.
And there's BMAT tomorrow... man I just hope I don't run out of time for each section and can plan and write a decent essay for tomorrow. If the essay questions turn out like those in the sample questions online, I am so dead man... >.<
SLEEPY!
Thursday, November 06, 2008
Need to grip tighter
You see, this is what happens when a mind lacks discipline - it tends to wander everywhere and fall into pits and holes ever so often.
I need more discipline. I need more focus. I need to stay focused in running a race where my shadow is the only other competitor.
No wonder sometimes indoctrination produces very effective individuals and believers. Just look at the whole Christian, or Muslim community, or whatever.
I guess I've yet to control and harness my potential properly. There's so much more to discover...
I need more discipline. I need more focus. I need to stay focused in running a race where my shadow is the only other competitor.
No wonder sometimes indoctrination produces very effective individuals and believers. Just look at the whole Christian, or Muslim community, or whatever.
I guess I've yet to control and harness my potential properly. There's so much more to discover...
Wednesday, November 05, 2008
A need to distinguish.
I don't know why, but I just feel like shit now. It's as if every darn thing is gonna go wrong by the end of this week - somewhat. It feels as if I should be doing something that I am not. It feels as if I am wasting my life as much as I complain that my sis is doing. Something just doesn't feel right.
I don't like uncertainties. Uncertainties leave in me a sense of apprehension and excitement, and at the same time, fear and nervousness.
I don't quite understand myself, really. Sometimes I cannot distinguish between certain things that I see in my life and around me...
Modesty, versus self-denial.
Admiration, versus jealousy.
Sincerity, versus hypocrisy.
Love, versus obsession.
I just can't figure it out.
Maybe that's why people choose to alienate themselves from emotion. Emotion clouds judgement. Emotions confounds logic. Emotions confuse even the best of minds.
Perhaps I should shut my mind out.
In the words from Dawn of War: "Blessed is the mind too small for doubt..."
I don't like uncertainties. Uncertainties leave in me a sense of apprehension and excitement, and at the same time, fear and nervousness.
I don't quite understand myself, really. Sometimes I cannot distinguish between certain things that I see in my life and around me...
Modesty, versus self-denial.
Admiration, versus jealousy.
Sincerity, versus hypocrisy.
Love, versus obsession.
I just can't figure it out.
Maybe that's why people choose to alienate themselves from emotion. Emotion clouds judgement. Emotions confounds logic. Emotions confuse even the best of minds.
Perhaps I should shut my mind out.
In the words from Dawn of War: "Blessed is the mind too small for doubt..."
US Elections
Number of Electoral Votes at blogging time:
Barack Obama (Democrat): 297
John McCain (Republican): 139
Conclusion? OBAMA >>>>> MCCAIN. And yes, Obama is gonna be the first African American president of the United States of America
Good riddance to Sarah Palin man.. McCain got STEAMROLLED by OBAMA. LALALALA.
See? I was right. Obama will win the US Presidential Elections. =)
Barack Obama (Democrat): 297
John McCain (Republican): 139
Conclusion? OBAMA >>>>> MCCAIN. And yes, Obama is gonna be the first African American president of the United States of America
Good riddance to Sarah Palin man.. McCain got STEAMROLLED by OBAMA. LALALALA.
See? I was right. Obama will win the US Presidential Elections. =)
Tuesday, November 04, 2008
Perhaps it's my fault
Everyday I see her wasting her life away, staring at a computer for hours at end without even leaving her seat, except to visit the toilet to wash up, or to go to eat dinner, or just to walk about waiting for the com to restart.
Every time she is on her com, it is always the same old set of things: Hi-Street 5, Gunz, MSN, Skype, sometimes on youtube watching random videos, manga, and occasionally blogging. Never was there a moment where she talked with the rest of the family, unless she was disengaged from her friends, who seem to be online for a large majority of their time and almost absurdly free enough to talk to her. God knows where all their time came from.
It's not just about her wasting habits though; her procrastination is a real worry too. Every Sunday, it is the standard routine: Play and chat and fool around on Friday and Saturday, then spend the entire Sunday stuck to her com doing her homework and chatting at the same time (not the most effective way of procrastinating, at any rate). When Mum and I ask her if she wanted to go out for lunch, she would always complain and nag and say she has a lot of homework. OK, admittedly I did that too when curriculum was still ongoing, but intentionally procrastinating almost all the homework is realy ridiculous.
And as a result, she sleeps at 2-3am every night - yes, every night. If it is not homework, it's chatting with friends via MSN/Skype and playing computer games. Not exactly the healthiest of things.
Moreover, it's not as if she is doing very well with school work either. Lately, I sense a growing sense of apathy and resentment towards her grades, and a decreasing motivation to seek improvement. Even sometimes when I offer help, she gives me that I-seriously-can't-be-bothered-with-you-now look. And her quiz and test grades just keep sliding and sliding. And the worst part, is that she never tells us the situation with her grades, lest she suffers a chiding from my cynical and cold dad. Mum doesn't seem to be able to help her much either, 'cos she is always immersed in her own work and hardly has time to spare for us kids.
Frankly, to be honest, I don't like the friends she hangs out with. Not a single bit. You can call me biased or whatever, but I feel that they don't provide the positive influence that keeps her motivated to study. I can say this, because I sincerely believe I am very privileged to have friends who have provided a positive influence to me - even if their grades are not necessarily as good as mine or whatever.
If I could, I would have just gone up to these guys I don't like and just shout at them, like can't you see that she needs to get a grip with her life? So stop bothering her.
But no. I won't. I cannot overstep my position. Besides, I have no right to interfere with her life.
But more importantly, I can't shake that nagging feeling...
Perhaps all this started with me. Perhaps I am the root of all evil.
The gaming habits, the staying up till very late, the procrastination, the atittude that seems like apathy, the lack of improvement, the laziness towards school work...
Perhaps all of this was my fault.
If that was the case, I have no right to criticize her for her failings, because all of this was caused by me. It is because of my irresponsibility and failure as a role model that has caused her to become like this.
I deserve to be reprimanded for everything that has gone wrong.
God, forgive me.
Every time she is on her com, it is always the same old set of things: Hi-Street 5, Gunz, MSN, Skype, sometimes on youtube watching random videos, manga, and occasionally blogging. Never was there a moment where she talked with the rest of the family, unless she was disengaged from her friends, who seem to be online for a large majority of their time and almost absurdly free enough to talk to her. God knows where all their time came from.
It's not just about her wasting habits though; her procrastination is a real worry too. Every Sunday, it is the standard routine: Play and chat and fool around on Friday and Saturday, then spend the entire Sunday stuck to her com doing her homework and chatting at the same time (not the most effective way of procrastinating, at any rate). When Mum and I ask her if she wanted to go out for lunch, she would always complain and nag and say she has a lot of homework. OK, admittedly I did that too when curriculum was still ongoing, but intentionally procrastinating almost all the homework is realy ridiculous.
And as a result, she sleeps at 2-3am every night - yes, every night. If it is not homework, it's chatting with friends via MSN/Skype and playing computer games. Not exactly the healthiest of things.
Moreover, it's not as if she is doing very well with school work either. Lately, I sense a growing sense of apathy and resentment towards her grades, and a decreasing motivation to seek improvement. Even sometimes when I offer help, she gives me that I-seriously-can't-be-bothered-with-you-now look. And her quiz and test grades just keep sliding and sliding. And the worst part, is that she never tells us the situation with her grades, lest she suffers a chiding from my cynical and cold dad. Mum doesn't seem to be able to help her much either, 'cos she is always immersed in her own work and hardly has time to spare for us kids.
Frankly, to be honest, I don't like the friends she hangs out with. Not a single bit. You can call me biased or whatever, but I feel that they don't provide the positive influence that keeps her motivated to study. I can say this, because I sincerely believe I am very privileged to have friends who have provided a positive influence to me - even if their grades are not necessarily as good as mine or whatever.
If I could, I would have just gone up to these guys I don't like and just shout at them, like can't you see that she needs to get a grip with her life? So stop bothering her.
But no. I won't. I cannot overstep my position. Besides, I have no right to interfere with her life.
But more importantly, I can't shake that nagging feeling...
Perhaps all this started with me. Perhaps I am the root of all evil.
The gaming habits, the staying up till very late, the procrastination, the atittude that seems like apathy, the lack of improvement, the laziness towards school work...
Perhaps all of this was my fault.
If that was the case, I have no right to criticize her for her failings, because all of this was caused by me. It is because of my irresponsibility and failure as a role model that has caused her to become like this.
I deserve to be reprimanded for everything that has gone wrong.
God, forgive me.
Monday, November 03, 2008
How Do I Live Without You...
I don't know why, but when I was listening to F.I.R's “天天夜夜”, I found that the english lyrics at the start sounded familiar. So I did some searching and found this:
*****
LeAnn Rimes - How Do I Live Without You
How do I get through one night without you
If I had to live without you
What kind of life would that be
Oh I, I need you in my arms
Need you to hold
You're my world, my heart, my soul
If you ever leave
Baby you would take away everything good in my life
And tell me now
How do I live without you
I want to know
How do I breathe without you
If you ever go
How do I ever, ever survive
How do I
How do I
Oh, how do I live
Without you, there'd be no sun in my sky
There would be no love in my life
There'd be no world left for me
And I, oh Baby, I don't know what I would do
I'd be lost if I lost you
If you ever leave
Baby you would take away everything real in my life
And tell me now
How do I live without you
I want to know
How do I breathe without you
If you ever go
How do I ever, ever survive
How do I
How do I
Oh, how do I live
Please tell me baby
How do I go on
If you ever leave
Baby you would take away everything
Need you with me
Baby don't you know that you're everything good in my life
And tell me now
How do I live without you
I want to know
How do I breathe without you
If you ever go
How do I ever, ever survive
How do I
How do I
Oh, how do I live
how do I live without you
how do I live without you baby
how do I live...
*****
Ran 5.2km today in school. I need to increase my distance... and improve my timing. Haha. Next time I should try for 8km, then 10km, then 12, etc...
Didn't go play ball in the end, cos I was tired. Settled with playing a bit of netball with Ada, Steph, and Jas with Dan Qi and JJ. Can't shoot for nuts lah. Should put a board behind the hoop! LOL.
After that went down to College Counselling office to speak with Mr Allan. Dan Qi asked stuff about PSC, whereas I clarified stuff about A*STAR and Common App. All those damned essays to write... sheesh.
After that, both of us went out for lunch with JJ. Met Dr Seah and Mr Koh at Sumo House! Haha.
JJ is so gay lah - even if it's acting only. Zzz. I'd wish he stopped that. I feel... morally torn from my conscience.
BMAT end of the week... sigh.
This feeling, I can't describe it. It's so weird that I seem to know more about myself everyday, yet I still can't fully understand or communicate with my heart. Haha... how daunting. Something I wonder if scientific inquiry can every explain: The heart and soul of a Man.
A song from F.I.R. Randomly chosen after listening to their songs:
*****
LeAnn Rimes - How Do I Live Without You
How do I get through one night without you
If I had to live without you
What kind of life would that be
Oh I, I need you in my arms
Need you to hold
You're my world, my heart, my soul
If you ever leave
Baby you would take away everything good in my life
And tell me now
How do I live without you
I want to know
How do I breathe without you
If you ever go
How do I ever, ever survive
How do I
How do I
Oh, how do I live
Without you, there'd be no sun in my sky
There would be no love in my life
There'd be no world left for me
And I, oh Baby, I don't know what I would do
I'd be lost if I lost you
If you ever leave
Baby you would take away everything real in my life
And tell me now
How do I live without you
I want to know
How do I breathe without you
If you ever go
How do I ever, ever survive
How do I
How do I
Oh, how do I live
Please tell me baby
How do I go on
If you ever leave
Baby you would take away everything
Need you with me
Baby don't you know that you're everything good in my life
And tell me now
How do I live without you
I want to know
How do I breathe without you
If you ever go
How do I ever, ever survive
How do I
How do I
Oh, how do I live
how do I live without you
how do I live without you baby
how do I live...
*****
Ran 5.2km today in school. I need to increase my distance... and improve my timing. Haha. Next time I should try for 8km, then 10km, then 12, etc...
Didn't go play ball in the end, cos I was tired. Settled with playing a bit of netball with Ada, Steph, and Jas with Dan Qi and JJ. Can't shoot for nuts lah. Should put a board behind the hoop! LOL.
After that went down to College Counselling office to speak with Mr Allan. Dan Qi asked stuff about PSC, whereas I clarified stuff about A*STAR and Common App. All those damned essays to write... sheesh.
After that, both of us went out for lunch with JJ. Met Dr Seah and Mr Koh at Sumo House! Haha.
JJ is so gay lah - even if it's acting only. Zzz. I'd wish he stopped that. I feel... morally torn from my conscience.
BMAT end of the week... sigh.
This feeling, I can't describe it. It's so weird that I seem to know more about myself everyday, yet I still can't fully understand or communicate with my heart. Haha... how daunting. Something I wonder if scientific inquiry can every explain: The heart and soul of a Man.
A song from F.I.R. Randomly chosen after listening to their songs:
Sunday, November 02, 2008
A good run
Ran at McRitchie this morning with Eugene. 4.8km... Felt so good haha.
Running at McRitchie wasn't just good because of the air and the terrain. It was... the scenery. As I was running along the dirt path, I came across very familiar scenes: the open-area at a crossroad with little canopy cover, the long long stretch of Lornie road, the pavement beside the reservoir...
They all evoked really strong memories of the past, when we used to have our cross-country event at McRitchie - until it was shifted to East Coast Park in 2006: The time where Prof Lai held up the horn to signal the flag-off for X-country, how the Year 3 guys all charged off at the start of the race, seeing the guys from St. Johns and Scouts manning the water stations along the route, how Fleming won because we had so many more members in our house completing the race, that moment when I raised the cup and shouted.. Ahh.
I can still remember back then, I had to give up running half-way and start walking because I was just so unfit. Sigh.
Now, I can run the whole distance and still got some energy to continue. But haha, big deal. Timing's still a problem though. Screw.
Those memories... wonderful wonderful memories.
After that, I went down to AMK to pick up my pants and bought a belt to go with my suit. Tried on everything once I got home. Hmm... looked pretty dull to me. So much black. =S
And I want a cobalt blue tie! >.<
OK. Time to get to writing.
Running at McRitchie wasn't just good because of the air and the terrain. It was... the scenery. As I was running along the dirt path, I came across very familiar scenes: the open-area at a crossroad with little canopy cover, the long long stretch of Lornie road, the pavement beside the reservoir...
They all evoked really strong memories of the past, when we used to have our cross-country event at McRitchie - until it was shifted to East Coast Park in 2006: The time where Prof Lai held up the horn to signal the flag-off for X-country, how the Year 3 guys all charged off at the start of the race, seeing the guys from St. Johns and Scouts manning the water stations along the route, how Fleming won because we had so many more members in our house completing the race, that moment when I raised the cup and shouted.. Ahh.
I can still remember back then, I had to give up running half-way and start walking because I was just so unfit. Sigh.
Now, I can run the whole distance and still got some energy to continue. But haha, big deal. Timing's still a problem though. Screw.
Those memories... wonderful wonderful memories.
After that, I went down to AMK to pick up my pants and bought a belt to go with my suit. Tried on everything once I got home. Hmm... looked pretty dull to me. So much black. =S
And I want a cobalt blue tie! >.<
OK. Time to get to writing.
Saturday, November 01, 2008
SAT, and HSM3!
SAT this morning was horrible. The invigilators at AJC are as horrendous as ever. Completely messed up my essay and left numerous blacks for critical reading and writing. Gah. I hope I will never have to see the stupid SAT again.
Now, I've BMAT to worry over.
After SAT, I headed down to J8 to get Ee Leng's birthday present - and bumped into Jo and Dan there, haha. After that headed down to the Cathay to catch up with Yun Zhi and Ai Wei. Waited for Zhao Ye, Yun Ying, and Leslie to come down to join us at about 2pm (apparently, they ended their SAT 45 minutes after those of us taking at AJC finished. Our invigilators were desperately cutting time here and there to make the thing end earlier lah. So frustrating). After that, we went to buy tickets and had sushi for lunch.
Hahahaha... it was then I realized just how much I've alienated myself from Chinese. I can barely speak a full sentence properly now. Sigh.
After lunch, we met Tan Li, who was apparently out from home since Friday morning (he stayed over at Jia Jun's house). Wahh. Then we idled about the Cathay for a bit before splitting off. Aiwei and co. went shopping, while TL, YY, Leslie and I went upstairs to play bridge. Today was damn terrible... kept losing. Sigh. Anyway, Eeleng joined us at 5pm, and then we went to watch High School Musical 3! As expected, their plot was crap - at best, mediocre - but their music and choreography was great as always. There were some nice lessons to take home though.
Their songs rock!! =D
******
I resolve, that I will spend my remaining days fruitfully. I will ensure that in my every way, through my every available means, my actions will leave only the best of memories in not just myself, but more importantly, in my friends, for they are ones that are worth cherishing, and I cannot bear to imagine what would happen if I did the same thing I did years ago when I left CHS primary and CHS.
Now, I've BMAT to worry over.
After SAT, I headed down to J8 to get Ee Leng's birthday present - and bumped into Jo and Dan there, haha. After that headed down to the Cathay to catch up with Yun Zhi and Ai Wei. Waited for Zhao Ye, Yun Ying, and Leslie to come down to join us at about 2pm (apparently, they ended their SAT 45 minutes after those of us taking at AJC finished. Our invigilators were desperately cutting time here and there to make the thing end earlier lah. So frustrating). After that, we went to buy tickets and had sushi for lunch.
Hahahaha... it was then I realized just how much I've alienated myself from Chinese. I can barely speak a full sentence properly now. Sigh.
After lunch, we met Tan Li, who was apparently out from home since Friday morning (he stayed over at Jia Jun's house). Wahh. Then we idled about the Cathay for a bit before splitting off. Aiwei and co. went shopping, while TL, YY, Leslie and I went upstairs to play bridge. Today was damn terrible... kept losing. Sigh. Anyway, Eeleng joined us at 5pm, and then we went to watch High School Musical 3! As expected, their plot was crap - at best, mediocre - but their music and choreography was great as always. There were some nice lessons to take home though.
Their songs rock!! =D
******
I resolve, that I will spend my remaining days fruitfully. I will ensure that in my every way, through my every available means, my actions will leave only the best of memories in not just myself, but more importantly, in my friends, for they are ones that are worth cherishing, and I cannot bear to imagine what would happen if I did the same thing I did years ago when I left CHS primary and CHS.
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