JCC upon my chest.
Show them we are the best.
Brunei's finally over and behind me. Thank God.
What next... ROC!
And after ROC would be CSB and SumEx and then it'll be joint term!
Wow time will certainly fly.
I just hope that I will be ready for the final day...
Monday, August 31, 2009
Sunday, August 09, 2009
I'm gone.
And that's the thing about working in the armed forces. At the end of the day, when you return home, no one's gonna come to you and pat you on the back and say "Thank you for defending the nation, my boy!" When you go leave the camp, no one will be able to fully appreciate the amount of sweat you've shed over training. It doesn't work that way.
6 hours countdown... going to my granny's house to have dinner, before heading to the airport.
... be back on 30 Aug.
6 hours countdown... going to my granny's house to have dinner, before heading to the airport.
... be back on 30 Aug.
I will leave here
Less than 12 hours to go...
I hope I will not be missed.
30 Aug... here I come.
No wait, what the hell am I saying?
JCC badge, here I come. x)
I hope I will not be missed.
30 Aug... here I come.
No wait, what the hell am I saying?
JCC badge, here I come. x)
Saturday, August 08, 2009
Gonna make it happen
Slightly more than 24 hours left... maybe I should start meditating for the rest of the time before I fly off.
Random note: I FINALLY MASTERED HOLIDAY ISLAND. =D
Maybe I should start planning my strategy for JCC.. so that I won't screw up in Brunei. I just hope that I don't have to do a CPT Sherwayn... >.>
Yesterday was fun. Can't believe that it has been our 2nd year anniversary. =D
Random note: I FINALLY MASTERED HOLIDAY ISLAND. =D
Maybe I should start planning my strategy for JCC.. so that I won't screw up in Brunei. I just hope that I don't have to do a CPT Sherwayn... >.>
Yesterday was fun. Can't believe that it has been our 2nd year anniversary. =D
Friday, August 07, 2009
2.5 days left and counting...
DAUGHTRY - LEARN MY LESSON
Tonight the sunset means so much
The one thing that you know you never touch
Like the feeling, the real thing
I reach out for the sweet dream
But somehow the darkness wakes me up
Well I felt this emptiness before
But all the times that I've been broken
I still run right back for more
You'd think that I'd learn my lesson by now
You'd think that I'd somehow figure out
That if you strike that match
You're bound to feel the flame
You'd think that I'd learn the cost of love
And paid that price long enough
But still I drive myself right through the pain
Well it turns out
I haven't learned a thing
Oh yeah
Sometimes I think I'm better off
To turn out the lights and close up shop
Didn't give up the longing, believing
And belonging
Just hold down my head and take the lost
You'd think that I'd learn my lesson by now
You'd think that I'd somehow figure out
That if you strike that match
You're bound to feel the flame
You'd think that I'd learn the cost of love
And paid that price long enough
But still I drive myself right through the pain
Well it turns out
I haven't learned a thing
You'd think that I'd learn my lesson by now
You'd think that I'd somehow figure out
That if you strike that match
You're bound to feel the flame
You'd think that I'd learn the cost of love
And paid that price long enough
But still I drive myself right through the pain
Yeah, well it turns out
I haven't learned a thing
I haven't learned a thing
I haven't learned, haven't learned
I haven't learned a thing
Currently blogging and surfing net from Bishan Commmunity Library. There's some work going on with the electrical circuitry at my HDB block, so all power was cut in my home. Tried to spend some time reading my Warhammer 40000 novels, but got bored of it, so I packed up my laptop and headed out of the house. Took a bus to J8, where I bought some toiletries for Brunei and had my lunch before settling down in the library. Got to go soon... have to get to Vivo by 6pm.
Ahh well. Time is ticking. If only it could travel more slowly...
If there's one thing I learnt, a relationship is possible only if both sides are willing and able. Otherwise, there's nothing left to be said.
Tonight the sunset means so much
The one thing that you know you never touch
Like the feeling, the real thing
I reach out for the sweet dream
But somehow the darkness wakes me up
Well I felt this emptiness before
But all the times that I've been broken
I still run right back for more
You'd think that I'd learn my lesson by now
You'd think that I'd somehow figure out
That if you strike that match
You're bound to feel the flame
You'd think that I'd learn the cost of love
And paid that price long enough
But still I drive myself right through the pain
Well it turns out
I haven't learned a thing
Oh yeah
Sometimes I think I'm better off
To turn out the lights and close up shop
Didn't give up the longing, believing
And belonging
Just hold down my head and take the lost
You'd think that I'd learn my lesson by now
You'd think that I'd somehow figure out
That if you strike that match
You're bound to feel the flame
You'd think that I'd learn the cost of love
And paid that price long enough
But still I drive myself right through the pain
Well it turns out
I haven't learned a thing
You'd think that I'd learn my lesson by now
You'd think that I'd somehow figure out
That if you strike that match
You're bound to feel the flame
You'd think that I'd learn the cost of love
And paid that price long enough
But still I drive myself right through the pain
Yeah, well it turns out
I haven't learned a thing
I haven't learned a thing
I haven't learned, haven't learned
I haven't learned a thing
Currently blogging and surfing net from Bishan Commmunity Library. There's some work going on with the electrical circuitry at my HDB block, so all power was cut in my home. Tried to spend some time reading my Warhammer 40000 novels, but got bored of it, so I packed up my laptop and headed out of the house. Took a bus to J8, where I bought some toiletries for Brunei and had my lunch before settling down in the library. Got to go soon... have to get to Vivo by 6pm.
Ahh well. Time is ticking. If only it could travel more slowly...
If there's one thing I learnt, a relationship is possible only if both sides are willing and able. Otherwise, there's nothing left to be said.
Looking in the past...
Was just reading my old posts in Dec 2006. And I was reading about council, the blood, sweat and tears that we, the pioneer batch of NUSHS, have shed for to build something from scratch, in the joyful hope that one day we would be able to create a legacy for the juniors to continue building upon, something worth remembering and lasting through the annals of time...
But apparently, my four years of service were all but an illusion.
If the pioneer batch of councillors ever came back to NUSHS together to look at the current state of our student leaders, I doubt they would want to associate themselves with the current council at all.
So much hope we have had. So much effort we have spent over our entire school term deliberating, brainstorming, troubleshooting, and building the vision-mission of our council, the structure of our council, jobscopes, committees, projects, knowledge base, resource base, logistics, systems, and to some extent, tradition and culture (remember how the student leaders had to go through a gruelling SL camp in 2005? Those were the days man.)
As I continued to read those posts, I couldn't help but laugh at myself - the passion, the determination, the child-like faith... that our words and actions in every meeting, every camp, every project, will go a long way to building a council that we so desire, be it directly or indirectly. Especially during that fine year of 2006, I could feel the council going strong, under the leadership of Ying Zhen and her exco - back then I stepped down from VP and sunk into a relatively low-profile position in the now defunct Internal Affairs committee. It was during that period where the pioneer batch struggled to find it's stand among school matters, which was not made any easier with people like Png around. =S
Even after that year, when Reico took over as President and the exco dynamics threatened to fall apart (I see the resemblance to my situation back in '05), council still went on pretty OK. We were slow in rectifying certain long-lasting problems, sure, but we were trying, and we never stopped. Because of the experience of the pioneer batch of councilors, we were able to learn from our mistakes and made sure that we did not repeat them in our subsequent decisions to make our school council a better student leader body, in contrast to the relatively young PSL Board.
But after we've come so far... what is there left of our work?
Nothing. Absolutely nothing.
The legacy and imprint that we pioneers hope we have left for our future generations... were all erased as simply as that. Four years of hard work, overlooked and forgotten in an instant the moment we stepped out of the school compound as graduants. It's almost as if the administration were waiting for us to leave before taking matters into their own hands. Nothing ventured. Nothing gained. Everything collapsed back into square one, and restarting with a new batch of students who are going to repeat the same mistakes again.
I looked back at my work, and can't help but cry. All the things I've done to try setting a standard in the council: The content for orientation games, recruitment process, frameworks, templates, council camps, jobscope for my own committee, and all the little things... I see nothing left that barely resembles my footprint. Essentially, there's nothing that I have done that has left an impact in my juniors at a council level. I would say that the same goes for most of the other pioneer batch councilors, and the pain is felt hardest by those who have contributed the most... especially Ying Zhen.
Sometimes life is just that cruel.
I once had a dream of returning to NUSHS one day to help out the school in any means possible: as a teacher teaching chemistry or biology, as a House master of Fleming, as a professional speaker to train future generations of Gavellians, as a senior advisory to the council/student leader body, to organize and facilitate student leader camps for the councilors, as an alumni planning all sorts of neat stuff together with the school to make student life more exciting, etc... But now, all that willpower is fading away...
Am I disillusioned?
But apparently, my four years of service were all but an illusion.
If the pioneer batch of councillors ever came back to NUSHS together to look at the current state of our student leaders, I doubt they would want to associate themselves with the current council at all.
So much hope we have had. So much effort we have spent over our entire school term deliberating, brainstorming, troubleshooting, and building the vision-mission of our council, the structure of our council, jobscopes, committees, projects, knowledge base, resource base, logistics, systems, and to some extent, tradition and culture (remember how the student leaders had to go through a gruelling SL camp in 2005? Those were the days man.)
As I continued to read those posts, I couldn't help but laugh at myself - the passion, the determination, the child-like faith... that our words and actions in every meeting, every camp, every project, will go a long way to building a council that we so desire, be it directly or indirectly. Especially during that fine year of 2006, I could feel the council going strong, under the leadership of Ying Zhen and her exco - back then I stepped down from VP and sunk into a relatively low-profile position in the now defunct Internal Affairs committee. It was during that period where the pioneer batch struggled to find it's stand among school matters, which was not made any easier with people like Png around. =S
Even after that year, when Reico took over as President and the exco dynamics threatened to fall apart (I see the resemblance to my situation back in '05), council still went on pretty OK. We were slow in rectifying certain long-lasting problems, sure, but we were trying, and we never stopped. Because of the experience of the pioneer batch of councilors, we were able to learn from our mistakes and made sure that we did not repeat them in our subsequent decisions to make our school council a better student leader body, in contrast to the relatively young PSL Board.
But after we've come so far... what is there left of our work?
Nothing. Absolutely nothing.
The legacy and imprint that we pioneers hope we have left for our future generations... were all erased as simply as that. Four years of hard work, overlooked and forgotten in an instant the moment we stepped out of the school compound as graduants. It's almost as if the administration were waiting for us to leave before taking matters into their own hands. Nothing ventured. Nothing gained. Everything collapsed back into square one, and restarting with a new batch of students who are going to repeat the same mistakes again.
I looked back at my work, and can't help but cry. All the things I've done to try setting a standard in the council: The content for orientation games, recruitment process, frameworks, templates, council camps, jobscope for my own committee, and all the little things... I see nothing left that barely resembles my footprint. Essentially, there's nothing that I have done that has left an impact in my juniors at a council level. I would say that the same goes for most of the other pioneer batch councilors, and the pain is felt hardest by those who have contributed the most... especially Ying Zhen.
Sometimes life is just that cruel.
I once had a dream of returning to NUSHS one day to help out the school in any means possible: as a teacher teaching chemistry or biology, as a House master of Fleming, as a professional speaker to train future generations of Gavellians, as a senior advisory to the council/student leader body, to organize and facilitate student leader camps for the councilors, as an alumni planning all sorts of neat stuff together with the school to make student life more exciting, etc... But now, all that willpower is fading away...
Am I disillusioned?
Saturday, August 01, 2009
Oh no
1 more week till I fly off to Brunei...
Sheesh.
At least now I'm more confident of my abilities. Though truthfully speaking, I am still doubtful as to whether I can pass JCC.
But... surely there must have been a reason why I've been put in infantry. Not signals, or armour, or even combat engineer. There must be.
I can do it. >.<
In the early morning rain.
In the early morning rain.
In the early morning ra-eh-eh-eh-in.
In the early morning rain.
Saw a letter in the mail
Go to war or go to jail.
Saw a letter in the ma-eh-eh-eh-ail
Go to war or go to jail.
Mama don't you cry
Little boy is gonna die.
Mama don't you cry-ai-ai-ai-ai
Little boy is gonna die.
Saw a ranger up the hill
Lock and load and ready to kill.
Saw a ranger up the hill-ill-ill-ill-ill
Lock and load and ready to kill.
Sheesh.
At least now I'm more confident of my abilities. Though truthfully speaking, I am still doubtful as to whether I can pass JCC.
But... surely there must have been a reason why I've been put in infantry. Not signals, or armour, or even combat engineer. There must be.
I can do it. >.<
In the early morning rain.
In the early morning rain.
In the early morning ra-eh-eh-eh-in.
In the early morning rain.
Saw a letter in the mail
Go to war or go to jail.
Saw a letter in the ma-eh-eh-eh-ail
Go to war or go to jail.
Mama don't you cry
Little boy is gonna die.
Mama don't you cry-ai-ai-ai-ai
Little boy is gonna die.
Saw a ranger up the hill
Lock and load and ready to kill.
Saw a ranger up the hill-ill-ill-ill-ill
Lock and load and ready to kill.
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